Notes on Deployment:
Life is lived in increments.
It is so much longer and harder and lonelier than I ever imagined or anticipated.
I never thought I'd be so stressed about him returning home for 2 weeks. Will we fight? Will we reconnect easily? Will our separate and independent lives easily merge into one? How will the kids handle him coming home and then leaving again?
It just plain sucks. That's all.
His damn unit is robbing us of the anticipation of him coming home by (surprise surprise) once again being so unorganized that they can't even give us an inkling as to when (or if) in March he will be coming home. Lovely. That gives me no idea as to when I need to clean the mold in my toilet. Or the dust bunnies under my sofas. Or shave my legs. In my defense about the mold and the dust bunnies...I am still doing housework. Just a more relaxed version. After he left I worked really hard to keep the same standards. One day Ellie came home from school and I'd been cleaning all day and I asked her if she was happy with how the house looked. She looked around and said, "We don't really care if it's clean, Mom." And that is when I decided to enjoy my children's oblivion. I read to them and we get Dominoes once a week. Life is sweet.
As Jaylon said, "Izaac doesn't even know he's supposed to have a Dad." And I am pretty sure the others feel abandoned by him. We are living a calm and peaceful life. How riled up will my children be when they have to say goodbye again. How messed up will I be?
This is fun. Really. A barrel of laughs.
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Darnit, Jami. I'm sorry. Enjoy his visit and try not to think about anything else (except maybe the shaving your legs part). =)
ReplyDeletei feel like you should binge on some ice cream and then hop on those things that fly in the air to come visit me.
ReplyDeleteeverything will work out jami. have more faith than you do already. you'll reconnect. the kids will be all smiles and joys. we're always praying for you.
Man, it sure feels like we got the raw end of the stick lately;( I'm soooo sorry you have been having a hard time, but I am soo glad your my friend and we can go through this togther! Your doing a GREAT job!!! Only have to survive 1-2 weeks right? :)!!!!!
ReplyDeleteIt will work out. When I went home it was like we didn't miss a beat. You will be so giddy to be around each other it will be like your dating again. It goes fast, so don't over think and just enjoy. It will be hard to say good bye again, but that just means your that much closer to being all the way done! I've got 59 days left. Yes it has felt a lot longer and has seemed to drag on forever, but it will pass and we will come home and our families will be stronger for having gone through it. Hang in there. Nate
ReplyDeleteHi Jami- That is a real bummer! Knowing you, you will everything really nice- Just smile and make the very most of his time there. When mom is happy and relaxed, usually the whole household will be too. Get those legs shaved, and get your lipstick out- ENJOY!!
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